Incessant Customer Service: It’s the Comcast WaySmart Solution
OK, really quick. Downloaded an update to my Xfinity mobile app on my iPad the other day and it appeared you still can’t check multiple email accounts without logging in and out. The app does have a handy Email a Question button, so I clicked and sent the following question:
“Can I track multiple Comcast email accounts without logging in and out?”
Simple enough, right?
Here is the response I received – all 688 words, including typos – plus a few thoughts I had while going through this. Laughed my ass off…
From: Comcast Mobile OTT Support
To: robert dearing
Sent: 2012-01-24 14:54:31 +0000
Subject: Re: Email accounts (KMM10919232V16859L0KM)
Thank you for taking the time to contact Xfinity Service Email Support.
My name is Jessil and it is my privilage <sp.??> to provide you with an exceptional and unparalleled customer service through email support. <Good, Jessil. I’m looking forward to that.>
Robert, we acknowledge you as our valued customer and we are truly greatful <Oops…check those forms for grammar and misspellings.> for your continued support for the most customer-friendly and reliable service that Comcast can offer. I sincerely apologize if you have to go through all of these trouble <Oops…uh, again.> in contacting us. Thank you for bringing this concern to our attention, rest assured that we will properly address the concern by providing you with the most efficient resolution needed to suffice your overall satisfaction. <Hmmm…that sounds good, but I’m starting to feel this is a bit inefficient to suffice (?) my overall satisfaction.>
I understand that you would like to know if you can manage multiple Comcast accounts on the Xfinity Mobile application without logging in and out. <AH! Yes! Yes! Yes! There it is!> My sincerest apology for all the inconvenience that this issues <Oops…> has caused you, Robert. <That’s OK! Whatcha got?> I know where you are coming from but you should not worry at all. <Empathy AND reassurance!…Nice touch!> You have reached the right person to assist you with your concern and I will now provide you with the most accurate and effective resolution for your issue. <Ooohhh! I can’t wait! Hurry before I forget my question!> I want you to know that your satisfaction is of my topmost priority. Comcast values your business and your time today. <OK…not so sure about the time part. Let’s keep it moving, Jessil…>
Robert, I know how important it is for you to manage your accounts with Comcast all at the same time especially without having to log in and out but currently this is function or feature is not yet available for the application <Ooohhh, DAMN, Jessil! You said you were going to help!>. You will have to sign in and out to manage your Comcast accounts. We truly appreciate your time in letting us aware <What?> of some features and what areas needs improvement that would be better in the Xfinity Mobile application. This will be taken into consideration to make the future releases of newer versions better for your convenience. <Why am I doubting that?> Rest assured that we will be forwarding this suggestion to our development team so they can look into it further and be able to come up with a better plan and solution. <You mean better than the obvious one, right?>
Just to set the right expectations, Robert, I have provided the complete troubleshooting steps <What the f*#! are we troubleshooting here?> on this issue and if incase <Oops..two… oh, I quit…> that the resolution above will not resolve it, please don’t hesitate to chat with one of our online representative at http://www.comcastsupport.com/chat for us to properly escalate a ticket to further check the issue. <Now you’re just messing with me, Jessil.> Please have the following information available when chatting:
* Name on the account
* Address where service is provided and mailing Address if different
* Telephone number associated with the account
* One of the following:
Last 4 digits of the Account holders Social Security Number/Account Number/Amount of most recent payment on the account or the payment date.
* Security PIN or answer to the security question (Comcast Phone subscriber only)
It is with gratitude to incessantly provide you with superior technical support that you truly deserve, Robert.<Please don’t, Jessil. Now this is just feeling awkward.> We always treasure every moment of your contact to us. <Are you breaking up with me?> We hope that you will never be tired of keeping your business with us, as this is the source of our drive to providing the most outstanding customer service <Whew! Thought you were breaking up with me.>. It has been my pleasure assisting you today and we truly appreciate your business with us. <Well, long-winded awkwardness aside, you’re welcome, Jessil.>
Thanking you is not enough <Oh, shit…Thought you were gone.> to show how we appreciate the loyalty that you showcased, again thank you for continuously choosing Comcast as your service provider. No one values your business as Comcast does <If measured by word count, I believe you.>, for you are the reason why we continue to strive for excellent and exceptional customer service.
If you need further assistance <Oh my gosh, Jessil. Now you’re just making stuff up.> , you can chat with one of our Customer Support Specialists 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at http://www.comcastsupport.com/chat <Are they as lonely as you?> or you may get in touch with us at 1-800-XFINITY (934-6489).
Thank you for giving me this opportunity to assist you. <No, Jessil. Thank YOU!> Your business is very much appreciated, and please do not hesitate to contact us again in the future, should you need further assistance. <Oh, I’m looking forward to it!>
Xfinity Service Email Support Team
Original Message Follows:
Can I track multiple comcast email accounts without logging in and out?
Sent from Xfinity Mobile App
Wow, a simple “we’re working on that!” would have sufficed…